How to Make Your Days With Toddlers a Little Bit Easier
Whether you’re a stay-at-home parent or a caregiver, spending all day every day with a toddler can be frustrating, chaotic, and sometimes boring – which leads to more frustration. Naps get forgotten or cut short. Meals are too far apart. Kids get overly tired or hungry and start acting out. And that’s not even considering the next day when you have to try to not let the same happen all over again.
I’ve picked up a few tips from the daycare and as a nanny to help minimize those days. Keep in mind that these tips will not completely eliminate the chaos. Bad days happen to everybody. But the ideas I will offer here have helped keep the kiddos satisfied and myself less frustrated.
Routine
The first suggestion I have is to set up a routine. When I first started my job as a nanny, I had two seven-month-old baby girls that soon learned to crawl. We spent most of the day playing on the floor or in the grass outside. But once they learned to walk, well, the days got a lot busier. They wanted to be on the go all day long. They didn’t want to stop even for meals and especially not for naptime. So their parents and I decided to set up a daily routine to help corral the girls’ craziness.
Starting a routine doesn’t have to be as difficult as it sounds. Here are some simple steps to create a schedule that works for you and your children:
Step 1
Just write or type a list of everything that needs to happen on a daily basis. Include meals, their nap if needed, play time, clean-up, even getting ready for the day. If you have older children, include however they come home from school. For caregivers, add in parent pick-up.
Step 2
Then think of how long each task takes. Will it take a full fifteen minutes to get your child dressed, teeth and hair brushed, and ready to start the day? Do you need thirty minutes, like they will most likely get at school, or a full hour for lunch? How long do they need to nap? Make sure to include the time that it takes for them to fall asleep. I know very few youngsters that can fall asleep the instant they’re laid down.
As an example, here is the schedule I created for this school year:
Step 3
Once you have the schedule made, you can create a general, pictured routine chart to help your little one learn it! I took the easy way of finding clipart pictures that matched the different activities, lining them in the order in which we do them, and hanging it up on the wall so that the kids could see.
This is one that I created a couple of years ago. Yes, at the time we had scheduled bathroom breaks. This was because the boys were potty-trained but still needed reminders to stop what they were doing and go potty. Again, this is an example, so if your child doesn’t need this reminder, you do not need to add it. Use pictures of whatever it is you and your kiddo do.
He or she doesn’t need to know the specific timing that each task starts and ends, either. But they can learn the order things are done. It was a relief when my answer to the question “What are we doing next?” for the twentieth time was to ask a question of my own:
“What does the schedule say we do after this activity?”
Fixed Lessons
The picture of blocks I used were not for Play Time or Block Time. They stood for Lesson Time. Yes, even at two years old, I had the boys sitting down to learn something. I did not introduce worksheets at that time. Instead, our lessons consisted of games, crafts, or other age-appropriate activities that focused on learning a specific concept. I allotted fifteen minutes each for two lessons because that’s as long as their attention span lasted. Here is an example of the lessons I do with the four-year-old now:
Some days, the activities maybe lasted fifteen minutes for both. Other days, one activity that the boys really enjoyed lasted the entire thirty minutes. When children are too young to understand time, then the time you allot is merely a guideline. And don’t make the mistake I did with the girls when I first introduced lessons. Let them determine how easy or difficult the lesson is, and how long it lasts. Try not to get frustrated when they can’t do something.
Honestly, the specific lesson time is just to get them used to focusing on a task. Even if the activity is just to scribble on a piece of paper for five minutes, your child can learn from it. Playing a game can teach them to listen and play well with others. Taking turns. Patience. Coloring will help your kiddo learn how to sit for longer than two seconds. Anything and everything can be turned into a fixed lesson.
Free v. Structured Play
One of the best ways I’ve found to handle toddlers’ energy levels is to schedule playing several times throughout the day. Some of it is free play, which is when the kids get to play with whatever toys or games they choose for a specific time. Sometimes it’s more of a structured play. This means that I select the toys or game.
Free play gives children control over something. One of the best pieces of advice I’ve been given is that the number one reason toddlers throw tantrums is because they don’t get to have any control. Somebody else tells them when to get up, what to wear, when and what to eat, when to go to bed. Letting them have a chance to choose what they do teaches them that they can have control at times.
It also helps them build their imagination. Creating storylines, personalities, even names for their toys are all ways that kids build up their imaginations. A favorite for my boys is to make families out of cars or dinosaurs. They use toy houses for the “families” to live in. They make up events for the toys to act out. And they play this continuous game several days in a row, until their sisters give them a different game to play, that is.
For structured play, I pick something fun that we can all do together. We play board games now that they’re all old enough to understand how. Simon Says and I Spy are two of their favorites. We also have dance parties on a weekly basis. Structured play teaches children to listen, to follow rules, and to play fairly. They learn to take turns and wait patiently. The best part? They get to spend time having fun with you.
Daily Records
This one is more for nannies, babysitters, and other caregivers that are taking care of children who are not their own. When I worked in a daycare, we had to keep records of what each child did during the day. What, how much, and when they ate. If and when they went to the bathroom or needed a diaper change. As well as things that they did such as lessons, crafts, and behaviors.
While recording every single thing every single kiddo did every day was time-consuming and, to be honest, annoying, I continued the practice when I began my job as a nanny. It made it much easier to keep track of foods the girls did and did not like or any possible allergic reactions when trying new foods. Their parents were better able to keep track of how many diapers the girls used in a day and if they were having regular poopy diapers. During potty training, the daily records helped us gauge their progress.
I also wrote down what the kids learned that day, any cute actions the parents might want to know about, any incidents with injury no matter how small, and any medications I gave. As a nanny, I buy writing notebooks, one for each child. When I finish a book, I give it to their parents and start a new one. Their parents often tell me how much they appreciate having the books to look back on. My recordings have become memory books of the kids’ early years.
Conclusion
Crazy days happen with small children. Not every day is the same. Toddlers are going to throw fits. But hopefully these ideas can help ease some of the stress and frustration. They’ve definitely helped my days run a lot smoother!
If you have any other ideas to help us make our days easier, comment below!
